Chad was pretty drunk already as he stumbled up the jetway. The girl at the counter had tried to say something to him, she was a solid 6 but he couldn’t be bothered to stop for anything less than an 8 so he pretended to take a call and kept on going.
Whoa
Was it really dark in here? How long had he been in the bar? Oh damn, red velvet seats? First class was baller.
He was about to move through the curtain to economy when vaguely European accent intoned, “hey Chad you should sit here”
Chad started to say, naw bro I’m in the back but instead, he found himself sitting in one of the ridiculous seats.
“Stay for the drink service Chad, it’s to die for.”
“oh my god Vlad you are so cringe”
The pile of giant black hoodie across the aisle stretched and revealed a teen rolling her eyeline-encrusted eyes so hard, Chad thought they might get stuck that way.
“Don’t mind Vlad, he’s like a 7th generation boomer or something. I’m Katarina” her hoodie sleeve slipped back just enough to reveal black fingernails wiggling in a hint of a wave.
“righteous” slurred chad.
Katarina cut her eyes to Chad’s seatmate. “Come on, man – he’s clearly in no state to consent.”
“You kids these days with your woke mind virus consent this and consent that . . .” started Vlad, but Katarina cut him off.
“Can it old man, you know the council agrees with me on this one”
“Ug FINE” the vampire waved his hand vaguely in Chad’s direction, and Chad was instantly, painfully sober.
The sudden shock almost made him lose the airport bar nachos, but the absolute David Lynch character in the seat next to him laid a strong slender hand on his shoulder and suddenly he was right as rain.
“attention esteemed Were-o-Plane guests, boarding has closed, sit back, relax, and enjoy your 13-hour flight to “
“Wait, what? Did I get on the wrong flight? Vegas is like an hour away tops.” Unencumbered by the false swagger of too much airport tequila, Chad was almost a sympathetic creature.
Almost.
“Don’t worry pet” the words fluttered in Chad’s ear as long slender fingers cradled the back of his neck” You are exactly where you are supposed to be”
Leigh Fisher 